The Daedalus Incident went through a fair number of drafts and permutations before it became the novel that’s on bookshelves now. Whole strands of plot were upended, characters changed substantially, you name it. And there were a few scenes that simply didn’t make the cut, like this one.
I was bummed to drop this scene because it was a cool bonding moment between the protagonist, Shaila Jain, and her boss, Maria Diaz. It showed their growing chemistry and gave a peek into their characters. It foreshadowed a bit more about Jain’s first mission, the ill-fated Atlantis, and how it might affect her reactions while it was hitting the fan at McAuliffe Base. And there were some nice Martian setting elements there.
And yet…ultimately, the scene didn’t carry enough water to move the plot forward, which is pretty much a cardinal sin of storytelling. It felt like it arrested the momentum of the story, and there were other ways of building character and relationships and backstory without that kind of pause in plot. Plus, the point-of-view here is that of Diaz, and this was the only time that happened in the entire book. (I basically stuck with Shaila’s POV in the future sections and Weatherby’s in the past.)
Looking back on this section, I do think it holds up decently, and could probably be inserted into the book without a major hiccup if you can forgive the shifting POV. Of course, reading this again more than three years after writing it, I can see how I’ve improved since and how that affected my approach to The Enceladus Crisis. (While Enceladus was revised thoroughly, I don’t have any full scenes that I tossed in their entirety. Progress? I’d like to think so.)
So here you are, a deleted scene, just like in a DVD. Except it’s a book. Enjoy.
—

Last week, I got an e-mail from one of the editors at WordPress saying that
It’s always great to talk shop with another writer, so when super-agent
I’ve been remiss in mentioning this here, so it’s high time I correct it. I’m quite happy to report that a new excerpt from
A lot of folks have said 








